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The greatest songs ever written about not getting laid

  1. Jethro Tull. "Said She Was a Dancer." 1987, Crest of a Knave.
  2. Jethro Tull. "Budapest." 1987, Crest of a Knave.
  3. Skee-lo. "I Wish (I was a baller)." 1995, I Wish.

Arguably the greatest transvestite songs ever written

(A similar but more deliberate list)

  1. Lou Reed, "Walk on the Wild Side"
  2. The Kinks. "Lola"
  3. Aerosmith. "Dude (Looks Like a Lady)"
  4. Culture Club. "Karma Chameleon" (Chameleon? Boy George? This one makes the list.)